The SF/F community outed a handful of bastards a couple of weeks ago. As usual, there were a few, well duh, have you read how women are portrayed/preyed upon in their books? There were a few I hadn’t heard of. And then there were a couple of authors I admire.
First time for that, and I’m still working on handling my feelings and my responses and those of my lit-social circle. Until now, I hadn’t considered that angle. To remain a fan or to cancel had been my own decision. To include or remove someone from my social media had been my decision. But as I’ve networked and moved in writerly circles, not only do I know more authors, but we have friends in common.
It’s been difficult navigating all the different responses to allegations brought to light. Disappointing in some cases—dudes who seemed to be cool suddenly circling their wagons around other dude authors and deciding that the slightest bit of previous wrong-doing by the accuser is proof enough that the author dude being accused can be exonerated on that alone. Confusing in other cases, as other friends shrug off the problems or don’t want to discuss the situations. And I’m sure my reactions, or non-reactions or reaction time has disappointed others.
It’s gross having to decide how many degrees out do I go from the original perpetrator. Which friends and connections do I distance from because they choose not to distance from harmful people? And who am I hurting by not distancing myself from certain people? Which conventions do I stop attending—missing friends and networking and craft talk—because certain authors will be there?
This shit is tiring.